Our cooking team reconvened back in January to gird ourselves for the 2008 Memphis in May World Championship Barbecue Cooking Contest. Some readers might remember the story I wrote last year about putting together a pit crew from scratch.

A quick recap: we were a swarm of barflies who drunkenly thought it’d be a great idea if we convinced 30 friends or so to pitch in $200 and try to beat some of the best pork smokers in the country. Scroll down or click here to read last year’s posts.

In spite of a huge case of overconfidence, our team, The Ques Brothers, placed 12th in the country in the pork shoulder category. For first timers, that is what anyone would call outstanding. It made a great story, at least. We were all happy: the team, the sponsor, the readers.

And then came The Ques Brothers’ sophomore slump. This year we’re cooking by the hem of our aprons.

I was talking to Diane Hampton, executive vice president of Memphis in May, and she laughed when I told her some of our financial problems. “You’re finally realizing how good you had it the first year,” she said. “Nobody, comes out of chute like you guys did.”

With a price tag of around $15,000, a good-looking barbecue team is not for those with light wallets. Not unless you manage to land a corporate sponsor. Businesses sponsor BBQ cooking teams for different reasons. Last year our sponsor gave us a huge chunka change to make the front of our booth a billboard for the company. We also had to feed employees on “sponsor night.”

Some big companies like Valero Refined (who came in 11th place) hire contractors to build party pavilions for employees and investors. It’s a prestige thing.

We found no corporate sponsors this year. The past week, we’ve gone through an agonizing reexamination of the budget. We are now hacking away amenities in terms of kegs of beer (1 keg=$40). As in, “Can we do without these $90 team buttons?” “Hell yeah, that’s two kegs right there.”

Everyone on the team, however, refused to buy the idea that we could do the fest with just a tent, a bar and a smoker. We are luxury hogs, all of us.

“We have to have a second level!” was the unanimous declaration at a planning meeting last week. Barbecue Fest is not your domain if you don’t have an upper deck upon which to stand and look over it.

Fortunately, one of our team members had a giant steel structure sitting in a field down in Mississippi. We just had to go pick it up — all 800 pounds of it. And put it together. And weld handrails onto it. And make it structurally sound. And paint it. And lay a plywood deck.

I feel most sorry for Danny, a general contractor and millwright, who joined our team for some much needed relaxation and vacation and ended up spending the last four days constructing our booth with a handful of others. Last night, at 9:30 p.m., I was popping his back atop the unfinished deck. “Usually I leave this to my chiropractor,” he groaned.

We’re all hoping to have most of it finished by tonight (Wednesday) — for friends and family night — when, to get things started, we’re smoking a half-dozen turkeys just for fun. For everyone else, the contest kicks off on Thursday.

Meanwhile, here are some links to whet your appetite as all the teams get their smokers in gear for the Super Bowl of Swine.

General overview of Barbecue Fest Events.

Jon W. Sparks writes about a cooking team from Belgium.

Food critic Jennifer Biggs blogs from Barbecue Fest.

Fellow Ques Brother and Downtown blogger Paul Ryburn’s drunk posts from the Fest.

Artists on team Sow Luau create crazy pig heads.

Story about company that rents monster tents to barbecue teams.

List of 2008 BBQ teams and where from.

I would like to officially apologize to the Memphis Police Department for speeding here to catch Oracle and the Mountain. I’m sorry, but I only break the law when it’s really, really convenient for me.

I had to catch the only band here who is from Memphis, who is not a rap group, who is somewhat representative of what currently, really goes on around here. (In my tiny head/world anyway.)

I mean seriously, where is all the Memphis music?

(I’m not talking about the Jerry Lee Lewis kind.)

We didn’t have 40 minutes for the Noise Choir? or Vending Machine? or even Lucero or Snowglobe or The Glass or whatever? Adios Gringos maybe? Joint Chiefs? Mouserocket? The Warble? The Subteens? Arma Secreta? I’m nothing that even approaches a music critic, but come on!?

In my head its early Saturday afternoon at the Tom Lee Park BSMF, most people are waiting around on the headliners, and this is the best time to wander and discover something. Preferably from Memphis. We have such an amazing, diverse music scene and it’s lame for it to just lie here dormant at our big “showcase.” I guess Muck Sticky and Saving Able is what the kids want to see.

But I’m not so sure. Maybe I just don’t get it.

Anyway Oracle and the Mountain was great.
We should have more acts like that.

Now that I’ve gotten my single, solitary gripe out of the way; I’m going to have some fun.

Maybe wander over towards the Buddy Guy, Lou Reed area. You guys should come hang out. I hear the draw today is 60,000, but it doesn’t really seem that crowded to me…

(I have pictures, but this computer is bobo… you’ll have to wait. I know you can hardly stand it.)

A corn dog is calling my name.

Cheers.

On Wednesday afternoon, I descended into Tom Lee Park and was greeted by the incredible smell of barbecue. The 264 teams are already smoking, even as they are still assembing their booths in preparation for this evening’s “Friends and Family” night.

Today is what a lazy writer would call a perfect day. Last night’s thunderstorms have brought in the most glorious weather. Feels like early spring with a nice breeze off the Mississippi River.

When I see the Jolly Roger flying amid the more traditional flags of Spain, Tennessee and the good ol’ USA, I realize that I’ve arrived at OUR booth. Such is the piratical playfulness of our team members. The place looks entirely different than I left it on Sunday. During the last two days I’ve been in the office, the Ques Brothers have been finishing up our pleasure palace.

Our pitmaster, Willie, arrived with the grill on Tuesday, and at midnight, he threw on the first piece of meat, a big beef brisket, that will be slow-roasted over applewood smoke and served at our party tonight. We’ve also put on a bunch of ribs, some chicken and various other non-meat items. Let me tell you: It smells terrific up in here. Here’s one of Willie, feedin’ that applewood flame…

Most importantly, Danny has brought us, as a reward for all the hard work, two kegs of Franziskaner beer. No crappy Budweiser for this crew. At least, not until these boys run out. Thank you, Danny!

Due to the sheer expense of having a team at the competition (our budget is $17,000), we needed to find a sponsor. Our facade — a large advertisment for Terex Construction — is the result of that sponsorship. The company also gave us a bunch of interior equipment: tables, chairs, cups, etc.

Earlier today, Steve remarked that our whole set up is very Feng Sui. Steve doesn’t seem like a guy who uses that world lightly. The interior is bright, breezy, roomy, shady, and the bar is totally stocked. Coffee John brought in a bag of alcohol infused oranges. “Instant screwdrivers” he calls them.

In this picture, you can see what we — total newcomers — are up against in the competition. We’re fussing with getting our facade on straight, while next door… well, how would YOU describe it? It’s like the Forbidden Palace in China.

Finally, with apologies to Joe Rosenthal, our team members Mikey and Frank raise the flag of Spain over Castle Ques Brothers.

Since first taking this photo, I have been accused of staging this dramatic scene. I would like to take this opportunity right now to say that while I did not stage “the event itself,” but I did say: “Oh wait, hold on a second, this stupid camera isn’t turning on fast enough. Okay, wait while I change the white balance. Hold it… Hold it…. Okay, wait that one was blurry, one more, one more! Okay Now!” And that is how we got this picture.